Black ties and bicycles

As I was taking a walk outside this evening two Mormons passed by me, bicycles, black tie, and all. The two guys were probably around 18, I would guess. The stopped next to me, and one of them spoke. This is how the conversation went in my mind in a flash:

Mormon: Good evening.
Me: Hello.
Mormon: Have you found Jesus Christ?
Me: No, I don't believe in God.
Mormon: Would you like me to tell you about how to improve your life through Christ?
Me: No thanks, I'm atheist.
Mormon: Have you read the Bible?
Me: Sure, most of it, but I don't believe in God.
Mormon: I would like to recommend you to read the whole Bible...
Me: No thanks, I just really don't believe any of it.
Mormon: Why not?
Me: There's just no evidence for any of it.
Mormon: How about all these plants and animals around us. How do you think they came into being.
Me: Please. Are you truly ignorant of what we know about that, or were you just hoping I was?
Mormon: Then how do you think there can be an absolute moral good without God?
Me: I don't think there is a absolute moral good, but there's plenty of evidence that we can be moral without God.
Mormon: Like what evidence?
Me: Like the fact that I am moral, and yet I don't believe in God. Like the fact that humans were moral before some confused goat herders wrote the Bible, and that other species can act morally as well.
Mormon: Uhm, okay sir, you have a nice evening now.
Me: How about you guys? How you found nothing yet?
Mormon: Nothing?
Me: Yeah. That there is nothing out there to guide you, to choose for you, to determine how you must live your lives, and that there is no afterlife. That this life is all you've got, and that you are wasting it away pushing a silly dream in ugly black ties and silly underwear. It pains me to see.
Mormon: Well, you have a nice night, now.

And this is the conversation that actually took place:

Mormon: Good evening.
Me: Hello.
Mormon: Have you found Jesus Christ?
Me: No, I don't believe in God.
Mormon: Would you like me to tell you about how to improve your life through Christ?
Me: No thanks. I'm okay. I don't really have room in my life for religion.
Mormon: Well, you have a nice night, now.

I'm such a milksop.

1 comment:

  1. Ah, but they gave you such a good setup:

    Mormon: Good evening.

    You: Hello.

    Mormon: Have you found Jesus Christ?

    You: Gosh, I didn't know he had gone missing!

    Tata!

    ReplyDelete

Markup Key:
- <b>bold</b> = bold
- <i>italic</i> = italic
- <a href="http://www.fieldofscience.com/">FoS</a> = FoS